Possible Reasons To Eat A Kiwi (Exhaustive)
Slightly hungry/Slightly thirsty
Have scurvy and happen to be walking through Whole Foods
Free sample at a Philadelphia art fair
Want to try out new kiwi tool that both slices and scoops
Think it’s a brown egg
Like kiwis
Hate kiwis/self
Looking for 200 tiny black seeds
In New Zealand looking for breakfast
Seeking a companion for strawberry for brilliant new Snapple flavor
Like brown fruit
Like fuzzy things
Want to impress a fruit enthusiast
Can only eat what you can carry in one hand
Just listened to Maroon5 song about Kiwis
Looking for something to coat in clear gel and put on top of a pastry
About to switch it out for a croquet ball as a practical joke
Eager to increase compost
Better than playing Mahjong
Trying to eat healthy
Craving sour
Nothing else to eat
Extreme obsession
Passing interest
Like the way it tastes
Trying to eat something quickly
Want to use the rinds as cups to catch rainwater
Want to show your kids how good fresh fruit is
Expecting distinguished guests who despise kiwis
Already tried dried kiwis, now you’re ready for the real deal
Appreciate two different shades of green juxtaposed
They’re about to go bad
Too guilty to throw it away
Done petting it
Looking for food you can steal easily
To cleanse the palate
To sustain/prolong life (sustenance)
Seeking an unlikely twist on an old recipe
Will only eat fruit in symmetrical slices
You work on a kiwi farm
Trying to determine the difference between green and yellow kiwis
Only dessert in your bag lunch
Trying to be the most cultured person in your midwestern family
Subtly trying to show off your spoon collection to your work friends
Just peeled it
What are we gonna do with all of these kiwis??
Got to get rid of this food
Tired of all other fruit
Wow that was sour. Let’s have another one.
Want to cut it into little shapes for some reason
Ran out of kiwi juice
Think they are pretty cool
Filming a movie about kiwis, need to do research
Prescribed by a doctor
Need something green for a fruit salad
Random whim
Daily routine
Made them look like little footballs for a Super Bowl party
Believe them to be supernatural
Believe them to be nutritious
Nothing else to do
They were cheap
They were expensive
They were unexpectedly in something else
They’re a unique experience
Need to treat oneself after a long day
Fruitarian
On a family vacation, in back seat
Cursed to do so
Want to make good use of old fashioned hard-boiled egg holder
Love to chop/scoop
Will eat anything
Will only eat kiwis, nothing else
Believe that it is part of a balanced diet
Prohibited from eating kiwis, but it’s cheat day
Trying to remember what it’s like to eat a kiwi
Reminds you of the good old days
First time kiwi-eater/child
Seized by a rabid hunger
Not impressed by apple or melon
Not using them to pelt intruders
At a frozen yogurt place, getting your money’s worth
It has been placed before you
Tradition
Throwing caution to the wind
No reason at all
Just remembered it’s in the small compartment of your backpack
On an expedition
On an estuary, need a snack right away
In Rome
Back home
Smells good
Sheer curiosity
Eating competition
Regular meal
Snacktime staple
Special occasion
Benefit luncheon
Just threw up, hungry again